2 am

It really is quite difficult to sleep when I have so many thoughts running through my mind. It's as if my mind refuses to let go of its hope so it constantly replays old memories mixed with wishful thinking for the future. All of this thought was inspired by a movie. Well, more like one moment. That was all it took, and the memories started pouring back. One mental picture from the past leads to another and another as if there is no end. It has been over an hour, yet I still follow the trail of thought. It seems I have turned to dreaming when awake instead of asleep. How can any good come from this?

Just when I thought I could get it out of my head, it returns in a heartbeat, torturing my mind. The sad part is I am almost to my end, I seem to have tried all that I can, but the outcome does not change. I am easily discouraged and have been many times this week alone. Where is all of my efforts going? Do they have any affect at all? If so, then what? Could I have done anything differently? Why do I feel solely responsible? When will my side be heard? When does what I went through get to count too? What went wrong?

Too many questions to answer at 2 am in the morning.